Vaginismus is an involuntary tightening of the pelvic floor muscles when a woman attempts to insert something into her vagina. It causes an intense burning pain and can make penetration impossible: The vagina may completely clamp up, blocking entry, as if it were a brick wall. Factors that can cause or exacerbate vaginismus include anxiety, past sexual trauma, or a fear of intercourse sometimes stemming from inadequate or nonexistent sex ed. There can also be physical explanations, like complications from pelvic trauma or cysts. However, these statistics are fuzzy because sufferers are often too scared to seek treatment or are misdiagnosed when they do.
What It’s Like to Have Severe Vaginismus
There are 2 types which can overlap. It occurs in the absence of an obvious ongoing cause and the skin looks normal. Sometimes the clitoral area is involved as well. Uncommonly, vestibular pain may be felt during arousal before any direct touching happens. Urinary burning and frequency can accompany vulval discomfort or occur alone with the same triggers. Discomfort tends to persist minutes — days afterwards. It may occur with the first ever vaginal touch or penetration, or after years of comfortable touch and intercourse.
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For the most part, they described themselves as satisfied, however, many mentioned feeling like they should be having more sex, but that life got in the way. Without exception, they all mentioned when they first got together, they were banging a lot more often. The limerence period, coined by psychologist Dorothy Tennov, represents the first 18 to 24 months of a relationship where you love (or overlook) everything your partner does, including never closing kitchen cabinets and talking over The Bachelorette, because your brain is hopped up on loving them. After that time, your brain chemistry changes, the excitement wears off, and you guys settle into more stable patterns-less frequent sex included. Men, especially, are expected to exist in a permanent state of horniness, and additionally that the frequency with which they get laid somehow directly correlates to their masculinity.